Desires and Fulfillment

Since desire is never satisfied, why is our society focused on the thing — rather than the being, doing, and growing into a priceless dynamic creation of value to others?

For more than fifty years, the focus has been on the want — rather than the want to.

In fact, the mantra has been, “I want, what I want, when I want it.”

Ego has become a god unto itself.

The propaganda of appeasing the appetite for careers, houses, and money has dulled our inner sense of fulfillment and happiness.

Let’s take a look at the difference between the want and the want to — of service.

Do we want a career? Or, do we want to grow and teach?

Do we want a fancy house? Or, do we want to provide a sanctuary of love, which protects and nourishes our families?

Do we want money? Or, do we want to enrich the lives of others, until the marketplace returns priceless rewards?

We all know this fact, “Wants are optional.”

There is another universal principle, “Needs can, only, be fulfilled through relationship.”

Go ahead, test the hypothesis.  Think of a pure need — sustenance for your wellbeing — and the discovery is relationship with another will be the solution to a problem. The other will be family, friend, neighbor, community, church, and probably even Nature herself.

It is impossible to satiate desire — because, we want what we don’t have.

Furthermore, the higher Power of the universe refuses to give us what we want.

We attract to ourselves the harvest — of what we deserve — from the seeds we have planted. Like attracts like and we receive more of who we already are — until, we decide to change.

Lack will attract scarcity — Richness will attract abundance.

The ultimate question, then, becomes, “Do we want? Or, do we want to — serve?”

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Do the Work

Those who have done nothing always amuse me — because, they presume to know everything.

Evidently, the one thing which has escaped the cauldron of their arrogance and ignorance is an understanding about the Buckets of Knowledge.

• Bucket 1 — Those things we know that we know.

• Bucket 2 — Those things we know that we don’t know.

• Bucket 3 — Those things we don’t know that we don’t know.

If we’re totally honest with ourselves, there’s a little bit of “ac-knowledge-ment” about what’s in Buckets 1 and 2. We’re clueless about that big Bucket 3.

Simply — “We don’t know what we don’t know.”

A closed mind is a dangerous thing to encounter. The dark, swampy, stewed mixture of arrogance and ignorance emits a stench from which to flee.

All we do begins with a thought.

Until we choose to believe that we have much to learn, actual learning is impossible.

After adopting new thoughts, we must embrace a new habit,

Say what we are going to Do — and, Do what we Say.

Since we learn by doing and the fun is in the doing, let’s have fun learning, together.

In fact, if our minds wander back to the regrets of the Past, or if they race ahead to the anxieties of the Future, we can calm them by focusing on the task ‘at hand’ in this Present moment.

Yes — by putting our hands into doing something, our minds engage in helping our hands be successful in this new adventure. Any ‘mistakes’ are merely acknowledged as measurements on this Journey of Progress.

From the Sage of the Ages,

Whatever your hands find to do, do it with all of your strength.

From the One of the Word,

My Father is always working — and, so am I.

By doing the work, we learn. We are also humbled — to be honored — in more fully understanding how little we know.

At that moment, we join true Leaders in the chorus,

What you learn — after you’ve learned it all — counts most of all.

In other words, let’s forget about the Buckets of Knowledge and open our minds to learning, more — by doing the work.

kimfoard.com

Emotion Follows Motion

So … there you are, wanting to feel in love, and wondering why Prince Charming is not riding in to sweep you off your feet.

For the faint of heart, stop reading, now. For the tough and tender, brace yourself and be prepared to laugh, with me.

First of all, that Prince Charming fellow is a caricature of Fairy Tales. The script is way too predictable: He gallops in on a white steed to save Damsels in distress. Now, really! Are you in distress and in need of saving?

Furthermore, pedestals and ivory towers are dangerous. Those perched high above the common folk were placed there by someone, are useless while up there, and, without help to get down, are stranded. Now, really! Does that sound like fun?

The fun is in the doing — and, we learn by doing. Let’s have fun learning, together.

Since I grew up in a sea of cowhides, that Prince fellow will need to tighten his cinch. While he continues the dysfunction of slaying Pet Dragons, I practice the Three-E Formula to Enlighten, Empower, and Encourage.

Enlighten ~ If you’re happy in a rut, which is simply a grave with the ends kicked out, I will frustrate the heck out of you. Since we don’t know what we don’t know, I’m constantly asking, “Why?” and, then, “Why, not?!”

Empower ~ If you’re happy being a victim, I will unceasingly tease you. The world is what we make of it — if it doesn’t fit, make alterations. By learning from the stories and experiences of others, I believe in building dreams into reality.

Encourage ~ If you’re happy taking without giving, I will show no mercy. Serving is the foundation on which all other noble traits of character are displayed. Character matters. Doing the right thing can be made easier by the catalyst of a kind word.

Speaking of which, these are the attributes of the Love that I want us to feel: Kindness, Patience, Honesty, Protection, Trust, Hope, and Perseverance. As we DO each of these, we BECOME kind, patient, truthful, courageous, vulnerable, optimistic, and willful in our desire to share Love.

Love begins with Motion and ends in Emotion.

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Doing The Impossible

Two fellows stand side by side at the Train Station.

One has just arrived to board the train.

The other has been there for quite some time.

In fact, day after day, he reiterates this belief, “Well, here comes the train, but it probably can’t get stopped.” As the train gently stops and passengers board, his comment is, “Well, somehow it got stopped, but it probably won’t be able to start, again.” Then as the train throttles down the tracks into the distance, he watches it go with a declaration of, “Well, that’s the last we’ll ever see of that train.”

Securely attached to his bad beliefs, that fellow is left behind.

The first fellow watches the same train come into view with the belief, “This is an opportunity made possible by the teamwork of many.” With confidence, he steps aboard in eager anticipation, “Those who serve me are deserving of my deepest appreciation and respect.” As the journey begins, he focuses on his purpose, “What goes around comes around. I intend to offer my best to everyone.”

It Couldn’t Be Done

By Edgar Albert Guest

Somebody said that it couldn’t be done
But he with a chuckle replied
That “maybe it couldn’t,” but he would be one
Who wouldn’t say so till he’d tried.
So he buckled right in with the trace of a grin
On his face. If he worried he hid it.
He started to sing as he tackled the thing
That couldn’t be done, and he did it!

Somebody scoffed: “Oh, you’ll never do that;
At least no one ever has done it;”
But he took off his coat and he took off his hat
And the first thing we knew he’d begun it.
With a lift of his chin and a bit of a grin,
Without any doubting or quiddit,
He started to sing as he tackled the thing
That couldn’t be done, and he did it.

There are thousands to tell you it cannot be done,
There are thousands to prophesy failure,
There are thousands to point out to you one by one,
The dangers that wait to assail you.
But just buckle in with a bit of a grin,
Just take off your coat and go to it;
Just start in to sing as you tackle the thing
That “cannot be done,” and you’ll do it.

Two fellows are given the same opportunity.

One is tethered to a distorted perception of reality.

The other is destined to make a difference in the lives of many.

All we do begins with a thought and a bit of a grin.

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Less Is More

Much more dangerous than failure is success.

With success comes loss.

There is a loss of striving to reach the goal.

After the empire is built, then what?

Last week, in the course of a three-hour conversation with an empire builder, he was most proud of one story.

It was not about the treasures of the empire — it was about the joy of doing. The story epitomizes the essence of this Universal Principle: the fun is in the doing.

As his eyes danced back to the memory of a time long ago, he spoke of a harvest. Earlier in the conversation he had briefly mentioned the juggling act of doing the seeding — in and around the other duties, of caring for his cows. His first love is the livestock — he farms to care for them.

He smiled as he reminisced about an accomplishment only a few can appreciate. As a member of his club, I enjoyed the verbal portrait he presented. It was one of a cowboy, a combine (without a cab and with a 14’ header), a small straight truck, 320 acres of 20 bushel wheat, and 11 days.

Just imagine hot August days — with hardly a breath of air — sitting in the open on a bouncing seat, above the spinning reel of the header, as it sweeps the standing stalks into the cutting bar. The moving aprons catch the fallen individual stems — with heads of grain — and gently rolls them to the center of the combine.

This continuous river of wheat flows under the driver into the threshing cylinder at his back. More dust and more roar, as metal fingers pluck wheat kernels from heads of grain. A cowboy, a combine, and a cloud of dust creep back and forth through the field.

The field is 320 acres. That’s one mile long and half a mile wide. A mile is the equivalent of 5,280 feet. With the combine traveling at two miles per hour, two trips across the field can be made in one hour. Each swath measures 14’ across. Since the cowboy, the combine and a cloud of dust have 2,640 feet (one-half of a mile) to traverse, that’s about 200 trips back and forth across the field.

Two trips per hour, nine hours per day, for eleven days was the time required on a bouncing seat, in the heat of August, through a fog of chaff, for our cowboy to earn the right to tell his story. In addition to the time in the driver’s seat, effort was also required to grease, fuel, and repair the iron beast. That was done throughout the stops to unload each hopper of grain into the truck for transport to the bin.

Short story — long lesson: the fun is in the doing.

Really?! Eleven days of slogging through the discomfort of heat, dust and itch. Fun? Yes! Because, the accomplishment — of a harvest — is the “Ribbons and Bows” around the planning and preparation that transforms thought into action.

Actions accumulate into a manifestation of success — the treasures of an empire. The stuff will come and go. The legacy will last, forever.

The legacy is, simply, to say little and do much. A little bit of verbiage can be powerful — by speaking only the truth. Yet, actions speak so much louder than words.

By giving our best, each and every day, we honor those pioneers of long ago — and, encourage the beneficiaries of tomorrow, to discover their own path to destiny.

www.kimfoard.com

Moving Forward

There are two things which limit our enjoyment of the Present.

You know, that moment of, “Right here, right now, it’s great to be alive.”

The two Things messing with our Gift:

Thing Number 1: the Past.
Thing Number 2: the Future.

“How?” say you.

It’s like this, offer I.

We are familiar with the Past. It’s our story and we’re comfortable with it. We play the movie script over and over in our mind. There are the memories of good times and cringes of regret. And, we become obsessed with the “What ifs …” Tethered to the Past with regrets, we are unable to enjoy the Present.

We are uncertain about the Future. We imagine a fairytale ending to our story and are caught up in the fantasies of, “Happily forever, after.” Then, we begin convincing ourselves of the impossibility and worrying about the risks. Fearful of the Future with anxiety, we are unable to enjoy the Present.

There is a better way.

Let’s put the Past and Future in perspective.

Past ~ This alone is denied to God: the power to undo the past.

Future ~ Someone once asked the Spartan king Leonidas to identify the supreme warrior virtue from which all others flowed. He replied: “Contempt for death.” For us as artists, read “failure.” Contempt for failure is our cardinal virtue. By confining our attention territorially to our own thoughts and actions—in other words, to the work and its demands—we cut the earth from beneath the blue-painted, shield-banging, spear-brandishing foe.

[Pressfield, Steven (2010-10-11). The War Of Art: Winning the Inner Creative Battle. Premiere. Kindle Edition.]

If impossible for God to change the Past, why do we waste time and energy in the endeavor? If fear is standing between us and the Future of which we dream, what can empower us?

That, my friends, is the rest of the story and moving forward is the secret.

I have friends who talk a good game. They read, they study, they attend seminars, they doodle in their pocket diary, they fantasize, and they talk, a lot, about what they’re going to do, someday. And, they remain stuck in their rut, by doing the same thing over and over, and over, and over … expecting a different result.

Frustrated in their insanity, they wonder “Why?!” they can’t move forward. Oh, they can. They simply won’t. They won’t do the hard work necessary to move from here to there. In fact, they don’t know where they want to go. Thus, the Hand of Fate has her way with them, along with everyone else.

Moving forward requires that we, as individuals, answer this tough question for ourselves, “What is the passion at the core of everything I do?”

No passion? Then, guaranteed, there will be no doing, learning, growing, teaching, or moving forward.

By tapping into the passion at our core, we will know exactly where we are going, what we need to do to get there, and how to take the next step. The easy answers to hard questions become obvious and we have the courage to make the tough choices.

We see ourselves standing at where we want to be and are able to discern the path from where we are to that new place. By conceiving, believing and achieving, it will simply be a matter of time until a dream becomes the reality beyond our wildest imaginations.

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Say Yes

Have you ever been around people who said “Yes” to everything?

They say “Yes” to This and That.

How can that be?

By saying “Yes” to This, aren’t they really saying “No” to That?!

Well, the simple answer is, “Yes!”

By saying “Yes” to one thing, we forego all others.

That is what Steve Jobs did. He said “Yes” to everything he believed in and “No” to everything else. Can we be so brave? I believe the answer to that is, “Yes!”

First let’s take a look at the lessons, Steve Jobs taught:

1. Enduring innovations marry art and science

2. To create the future, you do it

3. Never fear failure

4. You connect the dots of life backward

5. Listen to that voice in the back of your head

6. Expect a lot from yourself and others

7. Care about succeeding

8. Surround yourself with talented people

9. Stay hungry, stay foolish

10. Anything is possible

This is what all Rebels with a Cause have in common:

1. People matter more than things

2. Inspiration is the soul of leadership

3. Thinking differently is a way of life

4. Passion and vision make hard work fun

5. Changing the world requires action

What if every person woke up every morning to these 10 lessons and 5 beliefs?

The beginning of every worthy creation is at the moment when one person makes a choice to think and do in a way which honors their unique gifts.

Each of us has that choice to make: Will we lead? Or, will we follow?

As for me, Yes. I choose to lead.

Wisdom for Life

A good reputation is more valuable than costly perfume.
And the day you die is better than the day you are born.

Finishing is better than starting.
Patience is better than pride.

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Up To and Through

In regards to four letter words, this phrase trumps all others: “When this, then …”

Social Media exchanges and Text messages are replete with a variety of abbreviations and acronyms. It seems WTF is used as frequently as LMAO to provide dramatic exclamation.

Cloaking the unpleasant behind a mask of letters to make the offensive, somehow, more acceptable seems to be the hieroglyphics of this era of time.

In the category of WMD is WTT: “When this, then …”

We’ve all heard friends say and do it; in those moments of complete honesty, we even ‘fess up and admit saying and doing it. “It” goes something like this, “When I reach this age of twenty-one, then I can enjoy the benefits of adulthood.” Or, “When I discover this gem of a special someone, then I can learn to build dynamic relationships.” Or, “When I produce this adoring child, then my life will have purpose.”

Excuse me while I string together all of the Capital Letter acronyms above to dramatically exclaim, “What a JOKE!”

Lives are wasted by waiting on the barometric pressure, alignment of planets, phase of the moon, price of computers, political parties, religious beliefs, and perfect people to all synchronize into a defining moment of wonderful splendor. It ain’t gonna happen folks!

Let me introduce the concept: Up To and Through.

As we begin, it is important to acknowledge the anticipation of events. Stated simply and eloquently, there is:

A Time for Everything

For everything there is a season,
a time for every activity under heaven.

A time to be born and a time to die.
A time to plant and a time to harvest.
A time to kill and a time to heal.
A time to tear down and a time to build up.
A time to cry and a time to laugh.
A time to grieve and a time to dance.
A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones.
A time to embrace and a time to turn away.
A time to search and a time to quit searching.
A time to keep and a time to throw away.
A time to tear and a time to mend.
A time to be quiet and a time to speak.
A time to love and a time to hate.
A time for war and a time for peace.

It is natural and right to look forward to the seasons of life. Reaching goals is important. Resting to savor the success is one thing; thinking we have “arrived” is something entirely different.

The secret key to the hidden treasures of life is: Up To and Through.

Imagine a bicycle and the activity required to enjoy it. Since life is a journey, we need a mode of transportation, right? Setting aside the option of riding on the coattails of others, let’s continue the bicycle analogy. Hop on and let’s go for a ride.

Sure, we can ride in little circles around the neighborhood. Or, we can pick a farther destination. The universal principle is that we will begin with small circles and then move on to bigger ones. Unless we choose to remain in comfortable ruts, we will continue to pursue the challenges of the unknown.

We begin our bicycle tour by picking a spot for riding “up to.” As we reach that destination, we pedal “through” to another location, for the express purpose of continuing the fun.

Life is like that. The fun is in the doing.

And, doing; and, doing; and, doing, …

You get the idea: Up To and Through!

www.kimfoard.com

A Penny Doubled

If you were offered 1 Million Dollars, today; or, 1 Penny, with the opportunity to double it for 31 days; which would you choose? We all do it; we go for the immediate gratification and forfeit 9 Million Dollars!

Granted, instant wealth is a secret fantasy of us, all. The next best dream entertained is to receive compound interest on a passive investment. Least favorite is to, actually and actively, earn our way to wealth.

Since the odds of winning a lottery are slim to none and interest rates are little better, let’s take a look at the return on smart thinking and hard work. Passive investments hope to earn a percentage on what already is. Active efforts yield bountiful harvests from the whole seed, planted for the benefit of future growth.

Real treasure has nothing to do with money and everything to do with the lessons learned on the journey of Life.

Speaking of which, a rich Fellow had business obligations in a far away country. Before leaving, He entrusted money to three of his servants in proportion to their abilities. Two of them went to work and earned double what they were given. The third one dug a hole and hid the gift.

Upon the rich fellow arriving home, the servants were asked, individually and separately, to give an account of how they had used the money. Two of them replied, “Master, you gave me wealth to invest and I have earned double the amount.”

Their master was full of praise and to each of them said, “Well done, my good and faithful servant.You have been faithful in handling this small amount; so, now, I will give you many more responsibilities. Let’s celebrate together!”

The third one recognized the Farmer Philosophy inherent in the principle of the matter; yet, did nothing to increase the principal of that within his sphere of influence. His response, “I was afraid I would lose your money, so I hid it in the earth. Look, here is your money back.”

No percentage. No harvest. No celebration.

After the disrespectful excuses and tepid tirade, the fearful one was quizzed by the benefactor, “Why didn’t you deposit my money in the bank? At least I could have gotten some interest on it.”

It’s not about the money. It is, all, about the lessons learned on this journey of Life.

You see, the rich fellow didn’t really care about the money, or the percentage of its increase. He was more interested in providing opportunities for growth. That only happens by smart thinking and hard work.

Then, he ordered, “Take the money from the lazy one and give it to the one who harvested the most. To those who use well what they are given, even more will be given; and, they will have an abundance. But, from those who do nothing, even what little they have will be taken away.”

All, we do, begins with a thought and the fun is in the doing!

www.kimfoard.com

The Carpenter

Empires come and go —
Builders last forever.

The thing built is less important than those doing the building.

In fact, the real value in anything is the individual.

Because the physical is temporal, we find comfort in measuring the creation. Less comfortable is acknowledging the intangible value of the creator.

Silver Bullets and Silver Platters are two of the greatest dangers known to humankind. The idea, that Magic and Coattails can remediate anything, holds us back from our true destiny. We learn by doing and the fun is in the doing.

Regardless of how we define success, there is a Secret to its acquisition: It must be built.

Happiness, peace of mind, abundant resources, ample opportunities, great relationships, and contentment are included in my definition of success. All of those attributes are a choice to be made each morning and their achievement is only possible by my conscious decision to produce. As my head touches the pillow each evening, only, I can know the quality of effort for that day.

Others will judge what they can see and measure — the Empire. Regardless of what is built, it begins to decay at the moment it is finished. Within families, I see this every day. Senior builds an empire and then expects Junior to maintain it. How silly! We all want to be builders. More than what is built, the joy is in — the how and why of doing — the construction.

If a picture is worth a thousand words, a song is worth at least a million. For those who are builders, this song by John Conlee from his Harmony album reminds us of the value:

The Carpenter

Let us now praise the carpenter and the things that he made
And the way that he lived by the tools of the trade
I can still hear his hammer singin’ ten-penny time
Workin’ by the hour till the day that he died

[chorus]

He was tough as a crowbar; he was quick as a chisel
Fair as a plane, Lord, and true as a level
He was straight as a chalk-line; right as a rule
He was square with the world; he took good care of his tools

He worked his hands in wood from the crib to the coffin
With a care and a love that you don’t see too often
He built boats out of wood, big boats, workin’ in a shipyard
Mansions on the hill and a birdhouse in the backyard

He was tough as a crowbar…

He said anything that’s worth cuttin’ down a tree for
Is worth doin’ right; don’t the Lord love a two-by-four
If you asked him how to do somethin’, he’d say like Noah built the ark
You got to hold your mouth right son and never miss your mark

And you’ll be tough as a crowbar…

Maybe that’s why, two thousand years ago, the Son of a carpenter encouraged others to build. At His death, the physical creations left behind began their decay. What continues to grow — to this very moment, and beyond — are the relationships He formed in love.

We have the opportunity to build on that foundation. What we build is our choice. How we do it is more important. Why we make our choices will be the legacy of memories.

Long after our masterpieces become relics of the past, the relationships we form, today, will be the beginning of foundations for those who are influenced by our commitment to build.

Empires come and go, because they are made of stuff.

Builders last for forever, because their actions are making the world a better place.

That, my friends is a legacy for all of eternity.

www.kimfoard.com